Can’t seem to find your worth or value? You barely like yourself, let alone love yourself? Make yourself the subject of a project that will be well worth your time.
This may seem like a corny thing to do, but corny works sometimes. We’re talking about breaking a bad habit and building a new one based on love of Self. I don’t know about you, but affirmations don’t work well for me, because that little devil on my shoulder counters with a “yeah, right” every time I try to embrace something positive in an affirmation. This project puts you to work on something that will at first probably draw a “yeah, right” from you, but stick with it, please, for at least three weeks, because that’s how long it takes to deal with habits.
Find a cheap little bucket at the Dollar Store or craft store. It doesn’t have to be fancy. It can have dried paint in it, old treasures from the beach that your child collected, rocks. It doesn’t matter. Dump out whatever was in there and, if you’d like, decorate it in some way to put your own energy into it. It’s not necessary, but I happen to enjoy being creative. And now your three-week project begins.
Imagine that your bucket is filled with slimy rocks in gross, murky water. This is your past, the things that have robbed you of your self-esteem, your self-worth. With your intention, you’re going to dump out the yucky contents of the bucket and then see it clean and fresh, devoid of anything putrid. Now find a pad of sticky notes or some index cards to keep near your Bucket of Love. Your task is pretty easy. Every single day for three weeks (since it takes 21 days to break a habit or form a new one), you’re going to take a card so you can write, by hand, “I love and fully accept myself.” Like I said before, you may snort with derision or scoff at the truth of the statement, but choke it down and believe it as much as you can. After you write your note, fold it up little so that you’ll have plenty of room in your bucket.
Now, here is the add-on to the assignment. Every single time you catch yourself speaking unkindly to yourself (“Oh, Self, what a moronic thing to do,” etc.), you have to go grab another note to again write, “I love and fully accept myself.” Some days you may be adding five or six notes. That’s why you fold them up to make more room.
I can’t guarantee that, at the end of three weeks, you will look in the mirror and blow yourself kisses, overwhelmed with love for yourself, but I can tell you that this exercise will make you at least aware of how often you call yourself names or beat yourself up unkindly, and you’ll start catching yourself and correcting it, which sets you on the right path. After all, most of the things we say to ourselves we would never dream of saying to anyone else. If you need a reminder of who you’re really speaking to, put a picture in your mind of how you looked at five, and stand that child in front of you in your imagination. Your words will become more gentle and loving.
